I don't like anything fine grade because like you said, it gets everywhere. Unless you have very small sand sifters, I wouldn't get it. I have a diamond goby which is a sand sifter and he sifts my Carib-Sea Special Grade Reef Sand just fine, which is a much more coarse sand. I like it because it is easier to clean (I vacuum my sand) and doesn't hold a lot of detritus and trap nitrates because water can flow through it easier.
My second question is why do you want to buy used sand or "live sand." The best way to go IMO is to get new clean sand, some live rock, and a bottle of TLC Start Smart. Add that bottle to your tank and it cycles very quickly with almost no ammonia spike. You can add fish the same day you start your tank and I can almost guarantee your levels won't go above .25 on your ammonia and 10 on your nitrates.
I can say this because I set up a new 60gal 2 months ago for somebody and on the same day transferred in 9 small fish (gobies, lawnmower, cardinals, clowns, etc) from the other tank. I monitored the ammonia and nitrates daily for 2 weeks. Sand was new and rock was live that I had on hand. The highest the levels got were as previously mentioned and quickly dropped back down. There was the standard algae bloom in the water for a few days but nothing was ever at dangerous levels for the fish. We even put a rbta, a large clam, and several soft corals from the other tank in there at the same time, all on start up. Everything is doing great 2 months later and the tank was fully cycled with all those fish and corals contributing to the bioload.
In my experience, the live sand theory is a myth and I would rather start my tank up knowing exactly what I am putting in it. Prior to this tank, I had never used Start Smart before but after seeing how well it worked, I use it on all of my tanks now.
They make another product called Start Smart Complete that is used for maintenance. It helps keep algae levels down and your bacteria population high. I have found that my water gets exceptionally clear after using it, especially if you have a high bioload.
